When Women Talk Whine, bring the Cheese

I’m going to take a shot in the dark and assume that most of my reader’s have had a significant partner at one time or another. This is integral to hopefully prove my point as you read on.

Women, white or dark, love a tall glass of whine. They love nothing more than to verbally pour a detailed bouquet of self expression. It can be about anything, everything and anywhere, sometimes all three. A good robust whine can be centered on work, family, friends or her lifeblood, facebook. As long as she is heard by someone who cares; that’s you. And, since every action she makes needs an equal and opposite reaction, she wants you to listen; and occasionally retort.

That is a problem. Mainly because many of us men were manufactured with a listen & care gauge. That’s right, there’s a limit to how much we can listen to and care about in a single sitting.

Allow me to explain and solve.

There comes a time in every man’s life when we deserve to be left alone without the responsibility of having to dialogue. Times like these come around few and far between and sometimes blatantly exude, “I’m not in the mood to care or listen.” That’s right gents, “not talk, but listen. There’s a difference.

Maybe you don’t keep a mental record of them as I do, but there are many times when I’m okay to listen, yet under the influence of another challenge so a response can’t… it ain’t gonna happen. This usually occurs mostly when you’re watching your show or game and your woman presents something you are to care about equally like what she didn’t get for the made-up calendar insert “Valentine’s Day” or the newest installments of her friend’s 12 week old son, to see how big he’s gotten.

Problem is, not only could you care less to hear about what Glenn got Kelly or how big Jen’s son is… you definitely don’t want to hear about it, and now she’s wants you to respond.

SIDEBAR: Stop showing of pictures of children we don’t know. Seriously, Stop.

Gents, every now and then we catch a break and get lucky. I’m talking about those days and nights that we’re not on speaking to each other, which means we’re not listening to each other. It’s almost selfish that it feels kind of rewarding.

But, in the case you get caught having to care and listen to your woman’s problems, solutions or rants, just remember this…

She is searching you for information. She is literally Google-ing you. So be prepared. Do what I’ve learned to do. When she finishes her pointless (meaningless) anecdote, and presses you attention search button, simplee do this: pick out a few keywords, smile and respond.

That’s right…

When she starts to pour her whine, her verbal bouquet, look at her, act to mean it, quickly give her your top result… and cheese.